Tag Archives: #mum

Only Child.  No More Kids. 

There is always someone who asks or says “well, do you guys plan on having anymore children?”, “you don’t want her growing up alone and spoiled.”, etc.  But you know what, fuck y’all.

​I am an only child and so is my daughter.   I am absolutely thrilled that we chose to not have anymore kids at all.  I refuse to live up to society’s expectations to have another child.

So here are 10 reasons why I chose to have only one child:
1.  Babies are and can be hard work.  Honestly though, I had it SO easy with Jody that it makes other parents jealous as fuck.  Since being born, she has always slept through the night (seriously we never lost any sleep), she was always a quiet baby and even a quiet kid, always well behaved, etc, the list goes on.

2.  Traveling is easier with one.  The three of us can fit anywhere, we don’t need much space and we never need to pack too much.  If I recall, between the three of us, we only need maybe two suitcases for all our stuff (I am talking about a 2 week vacation).  We prefer to travel light.  Plus there is no yelling coming from the back.

3.  I am all about saving the planet.  Before having a child, I could confidently say I was a low-impact human.  I have seen first-hand how much waste one child can make, even with using cloth diapers and having conscious parents.  My daughter is only 5, so I know she still has a lifetime worth of consumption and waste ahead of her.  The planet doesn’t need more people.  

4.  I have dreams and goals I don’t want to put off.  Like it or not, having a child requires a significant sacrifice from both parents, particularly the primary caregiver. After five years, I’m still trying to get my life back together and identify myself as an individual who just happens to have a child.  Not to mention, I’m trying to scrape together the time to exercise (which I always make sure to make time for), study, do house work, cook a decent meal or read a book.  After having a baby, most women can write-off at least a year of their lives purely for baby-rearing. That’s something I’m just not willing to do again.

5.  Having a child is a long-life commitment.  Once that baby is born, he or she is yours forever.  You will always be your child’s go-to support person, safe place and (sometimes) financial institution.  I honestly feel like I’ve already committed myself to enough.  I’m married!  That’s pretty epic.  I have a mortgage — double epic.  Okay, so maybe I struggle a little bit with commitment, but I’m changeable.  I might want to run off and live in New Zealand or Japan one day, and we could do that easily with one kid.

6.  More children means MORE expenses.  As my daughter gets older, the more money we need to spend on food, clothes, schooling, and activities.  I can add up how expensive it would be to put another child into the mix.  At times, especially in the economy now, money can be tight, but I am grateful to say it isn’t a big source of stress in our young family.  Having another little person drawing our funds could tip the balance, and push us into chronic financial stress.  Um, no thanks.

7.  There is not enough of me to go around. To be honest, I’m spread thin as it is.  I know plenty of women who have two or more children and are constantly struggling to find time for themselves, keep fit, study, socialize (child-free), work or follow their dreams.  They’re tired, cranky, and turn to wine to deal with their stress.  Full disclosure:  Some days I barely cope with the pressure of my one and only child on top of day-to-day happenings, like keeping the fridge stocked, staying up to date with my work, and thinking of things to keep her entertained.  Some days I have period pain, and I can hardly even look after myself, let alone my daughter and ANOTHER child.

8.  If I am a good parent, my child won’t need me to produce a playmate.  I’ve heard of parents having a second child purely for the purpose of giving their firstborn a playmate.  I know of more siblings who fight with each other than play together.  One of my most important tasks as a parent is to be a playmate. I signed up for the job when I chose to have a baby.  I don’t want to send the kids off to play on their own.  I want to be involved in my daughter’s life.  It may not always be easy or convenient to jump in and play, but I’m happy to do it.  You can never give your child too much of you.

9.  I don’t care what society thinks I should do.  What I choose to do for me is my choice.  I’m not condemning your choices.  Whether you decide to have no children or 10 children is totally up to you. There’s no wrong way to love your family.  Just don’t let societal norms and judgments let you question your decisions.  People talk about “only children” being lonely and socially ill-equipped, but that’s just a stereotype.  My daughter is only 3, and she’s friendly, chatty, compassionate, approachable and, most importantly, happy to share.  I don’t care what people think.  I just want them to stop telling me what to do.  

10.  We are happy and comfortable.  We look forward and now focus on our future.  A new house.  A kick-ass vacation to a place we have never been.  The world is ours now to do what WE want.  We have had it pretty easy with Jody, and that is the way we plan on keeping it.  

So there you have it.


Cheers, SKÅL



Oops, I Did it Again. 

And again, I has been two days since I wrote something.  It is not that I don’t or didn’t have the time…well wait, I guess it is because it has been so busy that I didn’t have time.  

We got a TON of snow over the last 36 hours.  I would say by now it is at a good 3 feet that we have accumulated.  I love snow and winter and all but this was way too much.  It is heavy and wet and I won’t be able to get my car through it. Plus I just had my winter tires changed over.  

It is not cold but if it is windy, it is not pleasant at all.  The geese came back a couple of weeks ago and they must be confused to all this but again, at least it is not cold.  

We went to Radek’s mums yesterday.  We haven’t seen her in about 8 months.   But it was a nice visit and she brought us back some wicked gifts aka clothes.  So, that was really nice of her.

Jody has developed a cough again.  She woke me up this morning at 5am complaining of her head hurting.  Poor kid.  Her first headache.  Turns out she has a head cold but she is taking it as a champ like always.  I always wish it was me instead.  

But I am off now to go do wife/mum duties.   Have a great weekend.




Story of My Life: Part Two

Sunday, last day of the weekend, what a shame.  I ended up not writing yesterday because we ended up getting busy doing some yard work and all.  Back to the grind today.

We officially moved to Canada in 1992/93.  My mum and I moved in with her aunt and uncle up in the northwest of Alberta.  Being about 6 years old and seeing snow for the first time was absolutely fascinating.  I remember there was SO much snow that it was probably about 4-5 feet tall.  AMAZING!!!  I am not sure how long at this point that we had been living with them, but the government found out and gave my mum three choices, to take a citizenship test, marry a Canadian, or be deported back to Poland.  I personally think she chose the wrong choice and went with marrying a Canadian that her uncle had introduced her to that lived down the road from us and within a matter of a couples weeks or so they got married.

You could imagine as a kid, I was pissed.  Not enough there was tons of moving around, but then a divorce and not seeing my dad anymore and POOF!, then she gets remarried to someone she barely knows.  She says she did it for me, but she could have just as easily taken the test too.  But what do I know, right?  I was just a kid.  If it was me, I would have done things differently.  We eventually ended up moving in with him.

I think after all this, my life got twisted upside down.  I didn’t feel like I was part of anything anymore.  Before I go on, I should mention there will be some deep memories coming out.  Some pretty dark ones too.  Also, there might be some graphic (not too graphic) content also.

Before I go on, I should mention there will be some deep memories coming out.  Some pretty dark ones too.  Also, there might be some graphic (not too graphic) content also.

I grew up in an alcoholic and abusive environment.  My mum would physically and mentally abuse me.  This occurred mostly on a daily basis.  It got really bad at times.

**Memory – I remember once my aunt and uncle were gone somewhere and it was just me and her at the house.  She was off cleaning or doing something.  Does anyone recall a show called Rescue 911?  Good show.  I remember watching it as a kid and this one day I decided to call 911 just out of curiosity.  Now, don’t ask me why I would call 911 if there was no emergency but I just did.  I ended up telling the operator that I had made a mistake and everything was okay and hung up.  After a few minutes or so, my mum ended up coming in from outside and the phone had rung.  She answered and it was the operator calling back, asking her questions and making her well aware that I had ended up calling them.  I knew right away I was in major trouble.  She got off the phone and found me hiding.  Instead of being a loving angry parent, she became something that was not loving at all and demonic.  I remember her not only screaming at the top of her lungs but hitting me, and hitting me really hard.  Not on the butt for discipline but she would hit me so hard in the face, my head, and she would pinch so hard that it left bruises behind.  This seemed like it lasted an eternity, and she left me crying, bawling, on the floor.  That is the day I remember my nightmare of a childhood had begun.**

So we were living in this huge house but it needed a ton of work done in order to be completely finished.  The main floor needed a paint job, the ceilings, the upstairs was wall-less, etc….like this house would have been a beautiful home if more TLC was put into it to finish it.  The house had/has so much potential.  But it was a roof over our heads so I guess I couldn’t complain.  The driveway to this house was like a 1 km long or so, pain in the ass to walk to the bus in the winter when cold and the snow was drifting.  It was a nice property, a bit too far from town but still very lovely and quiet.  At this time of my life, I hate it, and everything else.

I have to cut off here as I have a bunch of stuff to get done before Jody’s friend’s birthday party but stay tuned.

Have a great Sunday!




Story of My Life.

Happy Friday!!

I think I have a bit of writer’s block today so I am starting a series story about myself.  With this, I plan to open up and reveal me.  So let’s get started.

My name is Agnieszka Klaudia Szawerdo and I was born on Saturday, January 4th, 1986 in Gorzow WLKP, Poland.  Both of my parents at the time were really young, my mum was 17 almost 18 and my dad was 19.  They were not married yet but ended up getting married later on in ’86.  From what I have been told was that we lived with my grandma (mum’s mum) and grandpa and their three-week-old new son.  You read that right, I had an uncle who was only three weeks older than myself.

We didn’t live in a house.  We lived in an apartment and I guess we made it work.  Eventually, my parents wanted a better and brighter future for us, or whatever their thought process was, and we ended up moving to Vienna, Austria.  I was about 2 or 3 years old when we moved.  I believe we lived in Vienna for about a year or so.  The crazy thing is I do have some scattered memories from Vienna.  I remember there was this street we went down, must have been a festival of a sort going on and there was a lot of people.  What I remember the most was there was this HUGE King Kong (fake of course but looked so real) behind this half cage and if I recall correctly, he freaking moved his arms and mouth and eyes and made sounds.  Scary as fuck, especially for a 3-year-old.

From my knowledge and what I have been told was that my dad wanted to move us to Australia but they rejected us and I think it had something to do with my dad though because Canada at the time rejected us also.  So, we ended up moving to Dallas, Texas, USA, The Lonestar State.  I have a lot more memories from living in the US than I did back home in Europe.

Funny thing is, I never knew and until this day, I still have no freaking idea what my dad does for work.  But regardless he worked somewhere.  My mum ended up working also and she worked at Ralph Lauren.  Living in Dallas was HOT.  When we first moved there, we lived in an apartment but it was a nice apartment.  We didn’t have much but as a kid, hell, as long as you have a roof over your head, food in your tummy, clothes on your back, a bed, and parents, you are golden.  But at the same time, I had no idea what was going on behind closed doors.

I think to a certain time and point in their relationship, they were in love with each other and were happy.  I do know though that my dad did cheat on my mum.  When it comes to cheating, I think there has to be a reason why someone cheats.  I  am not saying I approve of cheaters and cheating but you don’t just cheat for the fun of it unless you are a complete heartless asshole who does not give a shit about other peoples feelings.  Then again, okay, he is cheating so why stay with the guy?  She would always tell me “because I was so in love with him.”  I call bullshit.  I think she was completely dependent on him.  I also was made aware that he did hit her a few times.  Yes, I also think there has to be a reason to be hitting someone, again, unless you are a complete asshole and do shit like this for funzies.  In the end, as you may already know, this did not end well and they ended up divorcing.

Before the divorce, when my mum thought everything was fine, she found out that grandma (her mum) was up in Canada visiting her family we had there.  My dad ended up buying us plane tickets to Canada for us to go visit.  Little did my mum know at the time that he sent us off so he could figure out his plan and get divorce papers and what not.  All I know is before we headed back to Dallas from Canada, he ended up calling my mum saying that he wanted a divorce, he was seeing someone, and that he sold everything that was in the apartment, so meaning everything from beds to clothes, etc.  Now, mind you, I have heard only really one side of this entire story from my mum and personally, I think she over exaggerated a lot of it and I think she may have lied about certain things.

Anyways, we ended up coming back to the US and we moved in with one of my mum’s guy friends who was a genuine person but he was not my dad and definitely not my mum’s type.  I remember he was nice and he would have given us the world if my mum would have made a relationship work with him.  We ended up living with him for a good year until my mum’s and dad’s divorce was finalized.  After that, we ended up moving to Canada.

Okay, I am stopping here haha because I said I would make this into a series story, so if you want to know more I will be continuing tomorrow.  Enjoy the rest of your Friday.  Relax.  Have a glass of wine, beer, joint, whatever tickles your fancy.  As for me, I am going on to play Sims 3 for a bit and then hitting up the treadmill.  See you tomorrow.




**PS.  I promise I will post a couple of pictures along with my entry tomorrow.**

For Hours…

Have you ever found an interest in something or a hobby that you could just do for hours?  I have many things I could do for hours.  I could clean, I could write, read, paint, colour, etc.  Just a whole variety of activities I really enjoy doing.  (Yes, I enjoy cleaning.  #neatfreak)

As of lately, I have been a bit addicted to playing Sims 3.  I think the most thing that I do enjoy from it is designing the home that I have purchased in the game.  From picking the wallpaper to how the kitchen will look, I could literally sit here for hours and do that.  Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy playing the actual game and making my Sim character a success and build relationships and all, but the whole designing and rearranging furniture really gives me such fun.

I will confess, I played this morning already…for over an hour.  Guilty.  Sometimes I think the reason why I enjoy going on Sims to design the house and all is because it gives me many ideas on how I want our house deisgned when we decide to build or have a house put on our land in the future.  I love the home we are in currently but I think we need a little more space and this gal NEEDS more kitchen and counter space.  It would definitely be nice to just much a bit more space every  where overall.  I am not entirely sure what the square footage is on our current home at the moment but I think its only like 1000 sq feet.  For three of us with two indoor cats is not bad but again, we definitely could use the extra space.

It is amazing how we make things work in here as it is.  Maybe with bigger space we would be lost but I doubt it.  I think it would be less crowded.

Which brings me to another thing…I have a problem.  This problem is nothing to worry about but I have this thing that I like to rearrange and feng shui, and let me tell you, I could do that for hours and almost on a daily basis haha.  We have rearranged our home so much that the drastic changes it has gone through over the years is pretty amazing.  It’s always like a different living area.  Its amazing though how simple rearranging of furniture can make huge difference in the flow and harmonization of your home.

When I find a series on Netflix that I really like, I can watch that for hours.  Currently, I am watching Bones and am totally inlove with it!  I watched a couple of episodes last night but I think I have to go back and rewatch the end of one episode and rewatch one entire episode since I was passing out haha.  We were watching and already on season 5 of House but stupid Netflix ended up taking it off without any warning, so that was a real piss off.  We started watching Schitts Creek and that sort of made up for it.

All and all, I am sure everyone has a handful of activities and hobbies they can do for hours.  I think it is good to keep busy and always have your brain going or your body moving.  Life would be too boring if there was nothing to do.  I always find something.  If you have anything to ever share like so, please do not hesitate to comment and share.  I should go and do mum stuff haha.  Have a great Thursday!





Here is a little #throwbackthursday IMG_20160526_121200


In The Heat.

Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening wherever you are and reading this.  Odd title?  Yeah, a little.  Let me explain.

As you know, we have a female cat named Babs.  She was fixed back in February as it states on her papers and also the vet remembered her when I took her in for her vet check.  Well, she is definitely fixed BUT she still goes into heat.  Yes, it is possible.  It is called estrus meaning that after being spayed, some female cats may continue to exhibit the behavioural and/or physical signs pertaining to estrus aka heat.

Normally, when a female cat gets spayed, they remove her uterus and ovaries to prevent this from happening but in rare cases, some ovarian tissue was not removed and left behind giving a female cat those estrus symptoms.  It so happens Babs has this.  I could take her to the vet and get surgical exploration done but that could be costly and anything could go wrong from there.  I personally don’t really mind the whining or yowling, haha but I am worried a bit about her spraying which I do not think she would but she ended up spraying on Radek’s foot last night and I had to wash a couple of blankets in hot water at like 10:30 at night.  He was not impressed.

She ended up getting closed off in the mudroom with Baldwin so at least he had a roommate last night and wasn’t lonely.

Now, you are probably asking yourself, “why do they lock up their cat in the mudroom?” Baldwin is a good cat, really don’t get me wrong, BUT he can’t be trusted.  There are times we give him the benefit of the doubt but then he ends up ruining it for himself and he loses his privileges.  (Sounds funny, I know.)  He will get into things or jump onto things he is not supposed to. (Yes, I know typical cat but it does not bother me as much as it bothers someone else…)  The other problem is that sometimes when Baldwin poops, he either doesn’t pinch off properly hahaha, yes, pinch off, and I don’t want his poopy starfish on my furniture or for him to scoot his butt somewhere.  He can be a very lazy cat and not clean his butt either unless I get baby wipes and wipe it for him.  Yes, you read that correctly haha I, CountryCatGal, wipe my cats ass with a baby wipe.

Now you probably wonder, well if she has a 5 year old, “why does she have baby wipes?” Because baby wipes are the shit!!!  Once you have them, you will always have them.  Everytime we make a trip to Costco, we get the biggest freaking box that we can find.  I find they are very handy in any situation.  When we buy a huge box, inside it normally comes with a travel pouch and a regular box to store them.  I have so many of the travel pouches that I even have them in my car and our truck.  When it comes to travelling with a husband and a daughter, you do need them.  I swear by wipes.  Seriously, make a trip to Costco and get a box.

As for Babs’ situation, I hope it goes away on its own eventually.  She is currently cat napping on the satellite receiver.  I think it is because of the heat that it makes.  But at least its quite, for now.

Jody has preschool today and I should get some things done around the house before we head out.  I just really needed to rant about the ‘in heat’ situation because it is funny and if anyone else experienced this with their cat, just know, you are not alone.  But, I am off for now and hope wherever you are that you have a great day and or a wonderful slumber.




Does Anyone Read These Anyway? Part Two

Guess who is back?  Yup.  You guessed it, me.

Hope you all slept well.  I did but I didn’t if that makes any sense at all.  So let’s continue on from yesterday.

I also have two cats and a dog.  Both cats are indoors but one is allowed outdoors for a bit.  Baldwin is the one that is allowed outside from time to time.  He is about 9 years old now, orange (definitely like Garfield), huge (16.2 lbs), thinks he is boss, but a wonderful cat.  He is very vocal and there are times when he just will not shut his mouth.   He listens very well.  He comes on command, he will sit on command, and he will also high five, given there are treats of course.

Just a little over a month ago, we decided to adopt a cat because why the hell not so we went to our local SPCA and I picked one out.  We decided to try a female and to our surprise, she is a perfect fit.  Her name is Babette but we call her Babs.  Yes, I know we can change her name but this one suits her so well.  As for her age, it’s complicated haha.  On her adoption papers, it says “Mature 4-8 years” which I call bullshit because she looks and acts as if she is maybe only 2 years old.  She is a full grown cat but super tiny weighing in at only 8 lbs.  She is a tortoise shell meaning she has really a unique range of colours all over (don’t worry I will post pictures).  She is very similar to Baldwin personality wise but with much more extras like extra cuddles and actually sleeps with us.  I am so glad Baldwin accepted her.

I did mention we have a dog, right?  Right.  Her name is Kluska.  Kluska in Polish means noodle or fatter noodle.  She is about 9 years old now and is a Leonberger mixed with something else.  She was abandoned and left on our property as a puppy in a box so we kept her.  She is strictly an outdoors dog only but do not worry, her breed is very tolerant to our winters.  Trust me, I have tried to bribe her many times to come into the mudroom and she will not.  Kluska is the happiest dog in the world.  **This section has been a bit revised as I had a technical issue and lost the original.**

So you are probably asking yourself why am I writing and why now.  I tried keeping a journal but it didn’t go as well or as planned.  I used to blog like 3 years ago…..wow it’s been that long, and I read some of the stuff I had on here and just thought that I need to start fresh again and maybe, just maybe this will work better than actual journaling.  It’s only day two but it’s working out better than I thought considering how badly I wanted to blog all morning.  So here I am, blogging, writing…maybe it’s writing that is my passion overall.  I don’t mind the good ol’ pen and paper but I am super good at typing and fast that it works out better.

So like I mentioned before, I am a mum and a wife.  I also am a homesteader, stay at home mum, graphic designer and web designer (which I haven’t done in a while), photographer (another major passion of mine), and I guess I can say I am a medical transcriptionist but not really.  I took the course.  I did enjoy it and all of its challenges but once I found a job with an online company and three months later, only making just a little over 600$, it was absolutely not worth it at all.  They paid by freaking audio minute, no joke, like a dollar something.  I was so depressed and stressed and just felt so shitty for doing so good but not getting the credit that I deserved.  It would have been a perfect job from home considering that Jody only has preschool twice a week for 2 hours but it did not work out.   I did try to see what else was out there online, and other places pay the same or want more years of experience or pay by line, which is not much either.

Radek has a great job.  He is a power engineer but he likes to call himself a building operator.  He is so modest.  He gets all major holidays off.  He is welcome to take time off anytime and its overall a great environment and he genuinely enjoys going to work.  Plus there is ALWAYS work and it keeps him busy which is good.  I am glad and thankful that he is home every evening and on weekends and not gone a week at a time to camp or something.

Totally off topic but man I could sit here and type all day (should I consider writing a book?  That would just be wonderful).  It’s a good thing but I should tend to other things for now.  I know this will always be here if I need to write something.

It is really beautiful out here today.  Spring has definitely sprung.  But it is time for me to wrap this up and enjoy some nature.  Thank you to all who reads these.  It inspires me to write more.  Have a great day or night!




**Note to self:  Start saving your work on other programs and or print them out.**